May 18

Okay, first of all, let’s talk about signing into a blog. Why is it that about 1/2 the time it remembers me and my password, and the other half it acts like this computer has never visited this website before? I get not keepign the password forever and ever amen, but usually most keep the username.

I’m downloading a podcast that was posted a bit later than it normally is so I didn’t get it on my home computer. I love my iPhone. I think I just got stuck in iTunes Store never never land though. The other thing about the iPhone is the Genius Playlist capability, the only problem is about half of my music came from Chris and isn’t the final mastered version so it’s not recognized. Oh well… I don’t know why music can so dictate my ability to work (or journal, as it may be.)

I spent most of the weekend frustrated, feeling like I have no idea how I’m going to do this job and teach Pilates and have any chance at any sort of life after Austin is born. This is the job I would like to give up, but I don’t make enough money teaching Pilates to put the kids in daycare, so the choice is do that and make enough money but never ever see my husband, or do this and just do a little of that on the side. There is a new, very upscale development next to Franklin Green that I may see if has a gym or fitness center- I could start out with weekly mat classes and maybe progress up to buying some equipment…I don’t know how it would work exactly but it seems like a great idea. Plus they are building an elementary school, I could start a Pilates in the Schools program in Williamson County maybe…there are a lot of possiblilies, the only problem is the cash (or lack there of).

We went through the garage yesterday, I told Chris I’m a bit worried we didn’t find more to get rid of. I don’t know if it’s because we are being pack rats, or if it’s because we already got rid of so much. He assures me we’ve already gotten rid of it and that’s why it’s not there.

I need to do a headshot tonight so I can submit my article for Pilates Digest. I also need to get an idea list together and start writing more often. I spend a lot of time watching TV when I could be doing other things to further my goals. Plus, I like to sleep. I know I need to stock up because after Austin is born I won’t get any for a while, but still. How in the heck am I going to go back to work full time when he’s just 4 weeks old? I know it’s at home for 2 weeks, but still, I will need to sleep. I don’t know, I guess I need to just quit worrying about it and just see how it plays out.

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